Collaboration with a Purpose: Love – There’s No One Right Way to Love

Here we are, on the the day the February Collaboration with a Purpose posts appear throughout several blogs! Yay! 🎈🎊🎉🎂🎉🎊🎈

In my introduction post yesterday, I called February the month of love – many people consider it that because of Valentine’s Day that falls on the 14th – but even though Valentine’s Day is the day to celebrate romantic love, we thought why not expand it to all kinds of love? Familial love, romantic love, friend love, pet love, love for hobbies, love for places, any form of love is still love – just because society expects every man and woman to be coupled up doesn’t mean we have to; we can still be single and be full of love!

(Though of course, I can’t write much about being single as I’m happily married to my dear husband! And you may find it interesting that our wedding anniversary is on 14th February every year, which was my idea that he agreed to; it’s easier to remember an anniversary if it falls on a popular date, though it does make it hard to have a nice dinner outside as most restaurants are fully booked. 😆❤)

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Love?

Ah, love. It’s such an abstract emotion, so much that two of the common question Uncle Google gets are “how do I know I’m in love?” and “how do I know s/he’s the one for me?” when it comes to romantic love.

Many times I’ve read a romance novel where there’s an instant connection between the main couple – their hearts flip! Fireworks fly! Butterflies flutter in their stomachs! Their bodies burn with passion! – from the first moment they met. I like to watch cartoons (hey, I’m a kid at heart 😆) and this happens with a lot of Disney cartoons too. And what about fairy tales where the main characters decide they love each other from the get go and live happily ever after? It’s such a popular trope that I’m sure you’ve encountered it at least once somewhere!

Yep, popular media love to depict romantic love as something fast and furious and exciting. Then again, a slow, boring movie isn’t the most popular, right?

But not everyone loves the fast and furious way. Sure, there are people who get crushes on just about everyone, but there are also people who don’t get crushes much (if at all). There are people who don’t enjoy certain foods, but eventually grow to love them. There are people who aren’t cat people, but eventually grow to love a family member’s pet cat too. 😸

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Slow Love?

I have a confession – I’m a slow lover. Whenever I encounter something, being the cautious type, I usually pause for a while. I’m not one of those people who meets anything (or anyone) new with ENTHUSIASM, and instead I’d give an “Uh, okay, why not?” kind of response. 😅

Like with food, for example. Despite growing up in Southeast Asia where spicy food is prevalent (so much that most people eat McDonald’s fries with chili sauce instead of ketchup!), I grew up disliking spicy food. I didn’t see the appeal in burning my mouth when I ate and didn’t really enjoy curry and all the spicy food. And yet, for the past ten years, I’ve slowly grown to love spicy food. I still prefer them not so spicy – I want to be able to taste my food! – but every now and then I crave them. Especially Japanese food with wasabi. 🍱🍜

Another example being, my best buddy from school and I didn’t start out being immediate best buddies. We did hang out every now and then, but usually in big groups. Then somehow we got together towards the end of high school and became best buddies for the next 10 years! 😀

Even when it comes to my husband, my first impression back then was he was nice to hang out with. I didn’t get all the INSTANT SPARK BUTTERFLY EFFECT MY TRUE LOVE kind of feeling, but I was really happy when he asked me to be his girlfriend and many years later when he proposed to me. Yet, my feelings for him now – after a total of 12 years since we met – are more solid than ever. ❤

And even with video games! It’s quite rare for me to find a game that I fall in love with at first play; instead I enjoy video games the more I play them over time, and I even enjoy the games I’ve been playing on and off for twenty years. 🎮

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Is It Love?

I say it is! Despite the lack of fireworks and butterflies like what popular media depicts, I care very deeply for my dear husband. I also care deeply for my best buddy even if we didn’t hit it off from the get go, and we still hit it off now. And I can safely say I love and enjoy spicy food!

I believe there’s no one right way to love. Just because it doesn’t conform to society’s ideal of love doesn’t mean it’s not love. There’s no one right way to love, as love knows no bounds. ❤

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Hope you enjoyed this little piece! What do you think? What kind of love do you usually have? Do let me know below. 😀

~Nicolle ❤

A Short Self-Compassionate Letter

Dear Self,

Love certainly knows no bounds. ❤

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Read More on Collaboration with a Purpose: Love

• Barb Caffrey @ Barb Caffrey’s Blog: Celebrating the Love of Friends
• Divyang Shah @ i think my way: Love the Living Being
• Ipuna Black: A Mother’s Love
• Jane Love @ Harmonious Joy: What Manner of Love is This?
• Mylene C. Orillo: 5 People You Will Love in Your Lifetime
• Sadaf Sidiqqi: Love and Respect
• Sonyo Estavillo @ ‘Lil Pick Me Up: Love as a Solution: Diving Below the Superficial
• Swati Kadam @ Wholesome Reliable: Complement

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